11.13.2009

Obligation


Main Entry: ob·li·ga·tion
Pronunciation: \ˌä-blə-ˈgā-shən\
Function: noun
Date: 14th century
1: the action of obligating oneself to a course of action (as by a promise or vow)
2 a: something (as a formal contract, a promise, or the demands of conscience or custom) that obligates one to a course of action
b: a debt security (as a mortgage or corporate bond)
c: a commitment (as by a government) to pay a particular sum of money ; also : an amount owed under such an obligation
3 a: a condition or feeling of being obligated b: a debt of gratitude
4: something one is bound to do : duty, responsibility



I have said that in times I never truly do things out of wanting to do things. Like in example someone will say "let's hang out" and I'm like "sure" but I don't think I hang out because I want to but because someone asked me to. Does that make sense? There always seems to be some underlining purpose underneath it all. At least to me. I think that might stem from the fact that I don't trust a lot of people, and I feel that they feel the same as well. Then I get all butt hurt on the fact that people don't feel the same way that I do. Tho my opinions are quite loftly. Must be because I'm the thin the best of everyone.

In this manner of thinking, it comes down to hoping that people won't let me down. In this way by thinking I'm "obligated" to make an appearance, will keep myself accountable. Some people have asked me that if I have ever enjoyed the presence of another by the sure presence. I'm not sure I have... Sure I like to hang around so-and-so because they make me smile or listen to my stories, or it's something we can vent about. Then eventually the meeting are habitual and then they become unintended because it's programmed into your existence.

Think that is how I view school... until I get disinterested of course. I'm obligated to go.. do I want to go? no... do I like to go... no. So why go? Because...

Because...

Sigh what a sad way of life.

Imported from http://willischinn.blogspot.com/

Old dogs... new tricks...



Thats what I felt like on Saturday celebrating Brandon's 4th birthday. It was fun tho. Granted waking up before 8 on a weekend is not the highlight of my life. So we were to go get up get packed and ship over to San Ramon where my sister rented out this play area for B-boy. There was a blow up slide, lil vehicle area with balls, a jumper thing with 2 scaryhumgous monkeys, and a rock climbing area, add some air hockey cake and tons (about 15-20) kids.

So we were all waiting for everyone to show up and Brandon is already screaming like a little girl on the slide. He LOVES slides hehe. Annie, Ella and myself stopped by McD's for some breakfast, which to tell you the truth I have never eaten breakfast there so I was like... uh early... huh? Settled for an Egg McMuffin. Last time ever for that.

Basically I climbed the wall, and it was all good. Hurt every muscle I never knew in the process of course. Then with the ball area we just started pelting them at the adults and thus came to an all out war. So me being how I am dove for a ball like I was in highschool volleyball. And promptly injured my already fragile shoulder. (I broke the ball of the socket in freshman year of HS due to failing on a kick during team practice) Much to say I didn't rehab it well but i'm still able to use it. Was fine and dandy, I let it rest. Then Dodgeball started up again and once again I threw it out. Sigh I need to stop doing this.

So eventually I will have to step into a gym and do some rehab for this shoulder, like 2 lbs to get it to working condition. So yeah... old dogs... yup we don't learn new tricks, we just keep doing the same ones and failing.

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11.04.2009

11/4/09 Wonderments and whatevershinanigans

So what to talk about whilst I waste my time and this computer seat at the DVC computer lab. Hmm...

IMPORTANT!
1. I tried cheapening my drinks at SB. Went with that whole drip thing. It caused me depression lol most of which I cannot afford my $5 drinks anymore. I think I went in between both the cheap and the regular and had a Caramel Americano with room. Not too bad but not too great. $2.50 isn't a bad price.... right... RIGHT!!!!

2. Went to church on the weekend, it was really good. It's still speaking to me

3. Finished this finally. It kind of went in line with everything. Made me think about things in the long run. Almost comical as the next series I'm reading, due to Ray's daughter giving it to me to read.

4. Started reading this book, which to be honest is not something I would originally pick up. I got the book from Ray because his daughter was interested in it/picked it. So started reading it and it is a mix of... Left Behind, Lord of the Flies, and iunno pick some random Marvel thing with projectiles shooting out of their hands.

5. Randomly started watching this to pass the time and also to fill the space because the studying from last week basically killed all inclination and motivation from my body. (least i think i did well...) The interesting thing about this was that it was exactly what my heart and mind were saying. Almost sad in a way. TBC in another post.

Imported from http://willischinn.blogspot.com/